I had a talk with Bill, one of my best friends, yesterday. He’s the only practicing Christian that I know. I mean, I’ve met thousands of people who claim to be “Christian,” but Bill is the only person I know who actually lives his life the way that Jesus Christ spoke of in the New Testament. Years ago, a Racine man was dying of cancer. He was in a rehabilitation hospital in Kenosha, but his funding snafu-ed and they tossed him out. Trust me, despite what you may believe or have heard about “safety nets” in our society, this is not uncommon. The man was literally living on the streets while his jaw rotted away. Bill took the guy into his home and gave him his living room and couch to live on. Bill paid for the man’s prescriptions and ran errands for him regularly. He cared for the man for months, until Medicaid or Medicare or whoever finally straightened out their act and put the man in a hospital, where he died within a couple of weeks. I never heard Bill say much about what he had done for the man other than “this is what Jesus would do.” To my mind, that simple act shames all the glory-glory-hallelujahs sung on any Sunday morning or all the filthy money scammed by snake oil salesmen of “faith.”
Bill is 61 and I’m almost 58. I believe that he has suffered more physical problems than I have, or at least more serious ones, but we’re both caring for our mothers and I have the more demanding situation in that regard. We were reminiscing yesterday about the 16 years that we’ve known each other and where we have come in that time. We met in Alcoholics Anonymous, when we were both struggling to stay sober. Like me, Bill has become disillusioned with the practice of AA in the Racine area, though not with basic AA principles themselves. It mirrors our experience with Christianity: wonderful, glorious, even perfect principles; but the people “practicing” it lie and lie, and then they lie some more.
In the time that I’ve known Bill, I’ve envied him his faith. I’ve always thought how reassuring it must be to be so certain about the big questions, to be so sure that a loving presence is behind all of this insanity. As we reflected yesterday on family and friends and life and faith, Bill said something that deeply disturbed me. He said, “In the end, all you have is family, maybe one or two trusted friends, and everything else is lies.” ‘And everything else is lies’ – that is sooo OrbsCorbsian, so me, so sad . . . It upset me to think that the man I most admire for his faith and living his faith would come to the same conclusion that I have.
I come on this site and post all sorts of crazy stuff because I’m a crazy guy. I use satire and sarcasm extensively because it is so easy to hoist liars by their own petards, and occasionally it is funny, too. But the fact of the matter is that I am deeply offended by liars, especially by those in power (government, religion, etc.) who lie to those they lord over. I believe that the offense registers within me on the most basic level of my being. My transformation as a human in Alcoholics Anonymous was forged on the anvil of honesty - brutal, frank, searing honesty. Ever been on the “hot seat” in a group therapy session? That’s what it’s like, only 24 hours a day, every day. That’s how you stay sober, that’s how you face up to what you are and what you’ve done, that’s how you put yourself in a position to be changed. Nothing, but nothing happens with lies, except more lies. Yet lies is all that we are offered over and over again, whether it is the lies of advertising or the lies of the media or the lies of our politicians or the lies of the pulpit. They’re all cowards, every last one of them, without the intestinal fortitude to admit to who and what they are, and why they do what they do. I call them pigs because they have traded in their essential humanity for lies. Hogs. Swine. Oink-oink.
I was so hoping for something reassuring from Bill yesterday. It was not to be. I guess that means my exhortation of “Party on!” is still the only alternative to real change around here. Enjoy your lies and your liars, Racine. You’ve paid dearly for them.
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13 comments:
I don't know how you can claim to be crazy. You may be the most sane person I know. It is your sanity and clairity of thought that makes you crazy in a world of lies professed to be truth.
Being a christian or proclaiming faith does not mean you are a human. I guess that is the term I use. Bill is a fine example of a human.
We come into the world alone, regardless of whether someone is standing there with us, and we leave this world alone. Only our actions while we are living to others really matter. My only hope is that when it is my time, I can honestly believe that I have given more than I have taken and had a ton of laughs along the way. If I alone, can live with my lifetime of actions, I believe I've found whatever heaven could be.
You are right, the hell with those who redeem their misery by professing to be of good faith at others expense.
Thanks for the moving blog, orbs.
To be honest, Orbs, I have to agree with kk. You are such a focused person on things that truly matter. Nothing wrong with your noggin!
You never compromise your beliefs. You speak your mind and stand your ground. I truly respect you for never wanting to just go with the flow. That would make life easier, wouldn't it?
And I have to tell you that people who keep telling everyone how christian they are and blah-blah-blah, normally are trying to reassure themselves that they are. People who practice christianity never babble on about what a christian they are. They just do charitable works as the way they live their lives. They help people just to help people...not for the glory of being recognized for doing so.
You are blessed to have a friend like Bill in your life.
KK and Beejay said it all. I certainly couldn't have (seriously, I couldn't have) said it better.
Thinking you may be crazy in this day and age with everything around. Believe me anyone thinking that is quite normal!
Thanks for the kudos, but I don't think I deserve anything. This is just who I am.
I'd also like to clarify that this blog is not a screed against Christianity. If anything, it's against what Bill calls "Church-ianity." Substitute Islam, or Buddhism, or the Jewish faith for "Christianity" if you'd like. I just happened to be raised Christian. Or substitute socialism or capitalism or any other ism. We're all hypocrites to some extent or the other, but what galls me is that it seems to be the most hypocritical who always end up as our leaders.
Maybe they're the only ones who lust for power?
One thing I have learned in life is, ‘if you tell a lie, you have to remember it forever, or someone will catch you at it’! Tell the truth and you never have to worry. One lie builds to another, it is better not to answer someone’s question.As for religion, I believe everyone should believe in something, makes no never mind what or who.
A friend of mine and I were discussing “absolution”, well what the f**k is that. Does that mean, according to your/their religion I can go out and sin my ass off, then blaze to church on Sunday and be all forgiven? Now I’m ready to give it hell next week...give me a break.
I was raised Lutheran. In school, we were told there have been Theologians around for damn near ever. What do these people do, they teach you what they THINK happened since the birth of Christ. To me, these people feel if the “good book” does not fit “today’s” world, no problem, we’ll change it!
As with many of you, I can ramble on about this shit all day, so I will stop here so I do not bore you to death.
A lot of people in any faith talk the talk, but very few walk the walk. Those that do are called saints.
All I know is the moment when I meet my maker, I'm going to look at him square in the eyes and say "I'm in deep shit trouble aren't I?"
Yeah, there are definitely no pure among us...only those who pretend to be pure.
Orbs, I would rather ready your rants and mix it up with you when I disagree than those who spend so much time in a blogospheric echo chamber that their posts and comments couldn't pass the Turing Test.
As for religion, I call myself a Zen Atheist (think about it...it works). I was raised Catholic and went through a lot of phases to get here which, I recently realized, closely correspond to the Seven Stages of Grief. Shock (There is no God?), Denial (the hyprocritical still going to church hoping no one notices you don't believe phase), denial (going all evangelical...very short phase!), bargaining (really, I am a Unitarian, much longer phase), Guilt (I am going to hell), Anger (all my loved ones have lied to me all my life), depression (this life is it), and acceptance (the Zen Atheism part).
Orb's:
I spent HOURS thinking of your blog and e-mail to me, and now what you say today is what was MOST prevalent on my mind last night. I didn't call them "Lies" I was thinking more in the line of FAKES, FRAUDS. I have lived my life being a "SEMI FRAUD" I believe in TRUTH strongly but can easly "cover my butt" I have NO true friends, only people I respect and call them my friends. I am TERRIBLY loyal to my "so called" friends but, have NO idea how they REALLY feel? I can be terribly abrasive and thoughtless and ALWAYS regret it later. I lost my job mostly because I couldn't restrain myself from being overtly critical of others and their BS. I tended to tell it like it is. I am in a kind of "AA" mode now trying to improve my bad habits. Your blog from yesterday made me think of Church and Religion. I am not a terribly religious person really because I don't understand how and WHY things happen? I thought about my Mom and what a STRONG Catholic she was. The problem was she was ONLY as strong as she knew "Confession" could fix. "six Hail Mary's, six Our Father's" I babble all of this, because your friend Bill is RIGHT, and So are YOU. BTW I consider YOU and most all of the other people on this site my "Friends"
I have a friend who used to a chronic drunk. One day he found God and quit cold turkey. A complete transformation. Too me, that was a miracle.
That miracle changed my outlook on life. It reaffirmed my relationship God. I started praying. I began to treat people with better respect. I began to see everybody as equals.
That being said, we all are sinners in the walk of life. I'm not about to judge anybody. It's not my job. Nobody has to answer to me for their "sins" I'm no better than they are.
Orbs, thank you for doing this blog...I has made us all think.
You are a good person.
No, thank you, Beejay, you are a good person.
Toad, I'm always grateful for another friend, online or otherwise.
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