The picture that appeared in the paper (which, unfortunately, is not in the online version of the story) is enough to make any man wince. They are supposed to aim LOWER if you know what I mean. Getting tased in the family jewels almost makes me think risking a little death is not such a disaster.
I have not had much time to blog with all my trips, but found a video by Wally Pleasant, a Michigan State fixture. I think we have all been there at one point.
Sorry a little late in the day for this, but I'm going try it anyways. Each Friday, I'm going to ask four questions about you. Something lighthearted and nothing too revealing. That way each of us can get to now each other a little better. Sound Ok to you guys?
The masses have spoken. Seems like they dont like a rate increase in bad times, and fees hidden to fund DA's salaries, and pay off lawsuits caused by ignoring safety practices. For conduct unbecoming a corporate citizen, sneekyness and general disregard for what is right and good we award: We Energies the "Here is what We and Willie think of you" award.
Losing by one vote for the second straight week was no one's mayor but Downtown's: Johnny Dickert! You get the special runner up bird flip:
Fox Six news last night reported that the nasal spray version of the swine flu shot can only be given to healthy people because it contains LIVE H1N1. Add that to the shot version which has traces of Mecury in it. I understand the building of immunity, but this just seems out of wack. Am I wrong?
It's that time again, my fellow irregulars. Who's burr got under your saddle. Who chaffed you in the wrong way. Who tripped your trigger or ground your gord? Time to vent and ease your pain. Name and reason please. nominations close @ 3:00 sharp!
"The best show in town isn't at the Marcus Center for the Performing Arts.
"It's above it.
"A huge flock of what I've learned are starlings swoops high over the Milwaukee River and downtown buildings at dusk.
"The cloud of birds is roundish but constantly changing shapes. Sometimes it stretches thin and then quickly compacts again. From a distance, it looks like the swarm of bees that would chase people in the cartoons."
Hello, my mirthful meadowlarks! How are you? Have you seen the sun lately? Where did it go? O mighty Sol, have we offended you? How may we appease you that you will once again grace our skies? But you better forget about the sacrificing virgins bit, brother. Not in this town. If that’s the case, it looks like stormy weather.
No messages, letter bombs, or veiled threats this week:
I want to say that I have taken a moment from my busy schedule to place a positive spell on the city of Racine and its inhabitants, pro bono. This dreadful weather and economic turmoil has taken its toll on everyone in our city. Well, almost everyone. I hope that Mayor Dickert proves to be the person who leads Racine to prosperity and peace. And if he doesn’t, we’ll throw the bum out and put another bum in his place. Because this is Racine, the home of the Mitchell and the land of the Osterizer. Even my considerable powers are not up to turning around the direction of our city by themselves. We will all have to do our part. And the part of those whose wages we pay to tell us what to do. Rest assured, though, that we will do it. And when we do, the politicians will take credit for it. It is the way of the world. I’m not giving up on Racine, dearies, and no one else should, either. Together we can make our community a safer and saner place to live, no matter what City Hall does.
Onward to observations on the season. Here is “Halloween Pumpkin Scare,” featuring those strange humanoid faces that creep out Mr. OrbsCorbs:
I meant no disrespect to Mr. Jackson by posting that video. I never speak ill of the dead. Never. They make up almost half of my clientele. As many as you want to contact them, you wouldn’t believe how many of them want to contact you, and not necessarily to just reach out and touch. I don’t play favorites when it comes to business (except for my beloved Irregulars) and a lady has to do what she has to do to get by in these difficult times. If you feel like someone you know (or don’t know) from the past has been trying to contact you, they may be using my new Spiritual Signal Booster, pat. pend., only $24.95, including power adapter for both realms.
Here’s a much gorier one for you, Mr. OrbsCorbs, “Halloween Pumpkin Massacre:”
Isn’t it funny how we feel for a pumpkin when it has a human face? But not so much for corn, as in “Terrified Corn Cobs:”
Well, I must be popping off. (I am so sorry. I just couldn’t resist that.) I love each and every one of my Irregulars. Thank you for reading my blog. Don’t forget to send your obscene screeds and spare change to: madamezoltar@jtirregulars.com.
Keep your chins up and your umbrellas handy. Together we can ride out any storm. Lavoris!
Haven't seen or heard a peep in ages. We went out to eat once (Naturally there was a snow storm) and I looked up her particulars beforehand. She had this for an answer to the hair question. "The carpet matches the drapes." All I could think was, "Oh god don't let her be bald or I'll never be able to eat or hold a conversation." :-)
Lately, we have been testing our mini golf skills, our vocabulary skills, our homonym skills. I found another test for you to try. You can take a one minute wpm skill test. http://www.typingtest.com/ All this blogging must have improved my words per minute. Not a bad skill to have in the event of a job loss. When this website first began, they offered you plenty for free. I used it to hone my skills. Not sure how much you get if you download it now. It is a very good program, especially for beginners.
What happened? Mayor Dickert ran on a platform that included a "10 year plan" for the city of Racine. After the election, he dodged questions about the plan, then finally said that the plan would appear in his first budget. He told Dustin Block of the Racine Post that he knew exactly what every neighborhood in Racine would look like in 10 years, then taunted Dustin with, "Do you?"
Well, the budget was presented yesterday and there's no mention of a 10 year plan. I do not understand. By saying that the ten year plan would be "in" the budget, does Mayor Dickert mean that taxes will be raised for the next ten years?
Am I the only person who is insulted when lied to? Why do we elect liars? Why do we let them get away with lying to us?
And this one is critical to me personally, absolutely critical: how do you function in a society where others lie to you? How do you discern what is the truth and how do you decide which actions to take if you do not know the truth? I admit that I have never been able to figure that out. It has hampered me my entire life. Lying appears to pay off very well - my greatest "professional success" came to me when my job was to lie to customers. But it messes with my head big time - I am soon unable to function at all.
I am not joking here and I am not trying to raise a stink about Dickert. The JTI is hardly powerful enough to do that. But I am serious about lying: it has baffled and confused me for as long as I can remember. How do you deal with, how do you do business with, how do you interact with someone who lies? I just walk away. Physically, yes, I turn around and leave. (Remember the bloggers meet with Mayor Pedo?) I do not know what else to do.
What possible hope is there for a city when its leader lies? I do not understand this world. I never have.
** see lizardom's review below** First, let me say that it was very cool that we were direct marketed with freebies. The irregulars were noticed.
We've fulfilled our part by blogging and upping the buzz, so to speak.(pun intended) Last night I gave the free sample a whirl.
The bottle calls it a relaxationshot. Maybe this babe is too stressed out to relax, as I was not so impressed. Two ounces in the bottle of a clear liquid with a very sweet taste, but a distinct artificial sweetener aftertaste. (I hate that, my tongue still feels dry) The flavor sent to us was blissful berry. I've downed worse.
I didn't drink half, I was brave and downed the whole thing. I sat for an hour or so waiting for some effect. Nothing exciting happened. I don't believe I felt one bit more relaxed or sleepy. I went to bed and slept. I woke at a normal time.
The vitamins can't hurt. The natural ingredients probably won't hurt anything. But will it help?
I checked with the experts at Mayo clinic. Here is a direct quote from a Mayo Clinic Internist, Brent A. Bauer,MD. "If you're thinking of taking melatonin supplements to treat insomnia, there's little evidence that taking melatonin supplements will help you fall asleep significantly faster or help you stay asleep longer." I have to agree with that statement.
Their website says the cost is about $4.00 per shot. Hmmm. As our new friend, jedwis said, vodka is cheaper and probably more effective... certainly more potent.
Don't go totally by my opinion. We need to let others try it. Some of our irregulars do not dip into stronger spirits and are more inclined to use herbal and natural supplements. I know Lizardmom has been toting one around with her. Drink up lady! We need a second opinion! There are more available for the testing. Regular irregulars can email Liz or come to the next get-together.
Sorry iChill, I can't give it a thumbs up. I knew someone who once said that when you try something new, you live a day longer. I can always say that by trying iChill, I extended my life through the experience.
Well guys, you have no idea how badly I want to give this rave reviews. I am very familiar with valerian root as a herbal supplement. I have used it before, but never could get past the stink. So here are the highlights of my try of ichill - 1. No valerian stench - awesome! 2. I tried this while really annoyed and had a very sore neck and shoulder muscles. I'm still annoyed but my muscles are a bit more relaxed and not as sore - that's a good thing, tho i wish it would have done a little more. 3. The taste wasn't too bad but drinking out of such a small opening proved more challenging than me on a bad day could handle :(
Personally, all in all I would give it a 6 out of 10, not bad, but could be tweaked a bit stronger (at least for me - and I'm very sensitive to stuff)
Ichill folks, if you make an extra strength version, I would love to try it again :)
I stumbled upon a doozy and one that will probably make you laugh. It is called Dickipedia. Much like its predecessor, Wikipedia, it is an encyclopedia filled with "facts and information."
Alike in appearance, but, being generous.... slightly off center. I typed in a name that I was sure would provide some comic relief. It fulfilled my sardonic need.
So I was inspired by the recent challenge to post a blog, and I sat and tried to think of what is interesting enough to post. Then, while I was playing with my girls I had some music playing in the background and I thought I could share some lyrics and or poems that I really like. I have a huge appreciation for modern day poetry and lyrics. Here are a couple that have recently touched me. I hope you enjoy as much as I do and I would love to hear some from all of you of your favorites.
The first is from an artist that I was introduced to probably about a year ago. This song has always been special to me.
Brett Dennen – Ain’t No Reason
There ain’t no reason things are this way
It's how they always been and they intend to stay
I can't explain why we live this way,
We do it everyday.
Preachers on the podium speaking of saints
Paupers on the sidewalk begging for change
Old ladies laughing from the fire escape, cursing my name
I got a basket full of lemons and they all taste the same
A window and a pigeon with a broken wing
You can spend you whole life working for something,
Just to have it taken away
People walk around pushing back their debts
Wearing pay checks like necklaces and bracelets
Talking 'bout nothing, not thinking 'bout death
Every little heartbeat, every little breath
People walk a tight rope on a razor’s edge
Carrying their hurt and hatred and weapons
It could be a bomb, or a bullet, or a pen
Or a thought, or a word, or a sentence
There ain't no reason things are this way
It's how they always been and they intend to stay
I don’t know why I say the things that I say,
But I say them anyway
But love will come set me free
Love will come set me free, I do believe
Love will come set me free, I know it will
Love will come set my free, yes.
Prison walls still standing tall
Some things never change at all
Keep on building prisons, gonna fill them all
Keep building bombs, gonna drop them all
Working your fingers bare to the bone
Breaking your back, make you sell your soul
Like a lung, it's filled with coal, sufficating slow
The wind blows wild and I may move
But politicians lie and I am not fooled
You don't need no reason or a three piece suit, to argue the truth
The air on my skin and the world under my toes
Slavery is stitched into the fabric of my clothes
Chaos and commotion wherever I go
Love, I try to follow
Love will come set me free
Love will come set me free, I do believe
Love will come set me free, I know it will
Love will come set my free, yes.
There ain't no reason things are this way
It's how they always been and they intend to stay
I can't explain why we live this way,
We do it everyday.
The second one I wanted to share I also came upon while I was playing with my girls. I was reading out of the book "A Light in the Attic" by Shel Silverstein and I came across this one. I grew up reading these books but I guess I never really appreciated this poem until I became and adult.
How Many, How Much
How many slams in an old screen door?
Depends how loud you shut it.
How many slices in a bread?
Depends how thin you cut it.
How much good inside a day?
Depends how good you live 'em.
How much love inside a friend?
Depends how much you give 'em.
The last one is from the book "Place of Birth" by David Kherdian. It also speaks a lot to me, with moving away from home and trying to get back. I think it sums it up perfectly. Things will never be the same again.
The Place of Birth
The street grown dark with inhabitants and time
I walk in hesitation down that block
I ran in my youth for home,
or to the empty lot to play-
that I have reached now walking the other way.
For home has vanished, gone-
the one behind me and the one before
that I can never reach again,
and I wonder why I have come,
though my feet move me on.
When they let me in, the Mexican couple
with scattering of children-
so warm and open all of them
that I hide my hesitation and sadness,
my confusion in having come to this shrunken place.
That I can walk now in minutes, that took my life
and the lives of others
so long to live and endure.
Their faces wonder what my heart asks:
for none of our eyes can answer questions beyond the mind
I walk outside and they follow,
I turn toward the backyard and they trail behind,
and stop when I bend to pick up a shard
from the plum tree that is earth returned
but was once my sister's secret home.
And I stick it in my pocket and smile,
and for the first time
refuse to give any explanations
while I watch their mouths moving to answers
they cannot find.
HAYWARD, Wis. (AP) -- Shoppers in a Wisconsin grocery store got an unexpected surprise when a 125-pound black bear wandered inside and headed straight for the beer cooler.
