Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Elder Abuse

Okay, let's really talk about elder abuse.

I took my 95-1/2 year old Mother In Law to her supposed doctor on Monday. The doctor asks her how she is doing and out of the blue, she says her 'tail-bone' hurts. This doctor looks and says it is a level 1 wound! Home Health Care! (Nothing had been said to me before this visit about any problem...)

On Tuesday, Home Health Care comes and looks at her butt and the nurses come out and say to me, 'did the Doctor look at her butt?' Yep, she did...it is DIAPER RASH. So off to the store I go to get Balmex (diaper rash balm). Today, they return and, guess what it is healing up very nicely. Again, I am asked 'did the doctor really look at this?' Yep, she did, I respond! And Grandma has no more pain! Duh.,...now the doctor wanted an x-ray...not gonna happen...I doubt we need one for DIAPER RASH! The Home Health Care Nurse told my MIL to not do it unless she felt it necessary. Grandma doesn't want any x-ray...to do this to a woman with severe osteoporosis is not a good idea. She could end up with more injured vertebra(sp).

Next, they decide a physical therapist should come in and check on her walker and how she walks. Remember her age, 95-1/2 years old! The PT commends me on the bathroom set-up...grab bars, shower seat, assist on the toilet...you name it, it is in her bathroom...thank God I had just cleaned up after her. Whew. But this bathroom has been evaluated twice before by PTs, so I was waiting for this gal to find something wrong...nothing...BUT the doctor had told me I should have someone come in an evaluate it a few months ago. I refused. Told her I had my home evaluated THREE times so far and as far as I was concerned, it was just fine. Good grief. I have more grab bars than a nursing home!

Oh yeah, there is more: Nine more times the PT is coming to try and improve her strength...(WTH???) And additionally, an Occupational Therapist is going to come cuz Grandma complained about her shoulder, which she broke 12 (yep, 12) years ago! Oh, come on now...do we need intervention by someone on this stuff. You think you are going to improve her pain level after 12 years? Get off it. Oh and she should stand up straighter. Never in all the time I have known this woman, has she stood erect. What next, they break her back?

Here is the best part, I had been trying for the longest time to get her to purchase a new walker...nope, 'I'm not going to live long enough to get my money's worth out of it!' Biggie D tells her she has no option, she has to do it...has me drive her to the Medical Supply house, picks one out for her and convinces her that she has to do it. I thank God for him every day.

I, as a caregiver, cannot refuse anything that is being suggested for fear of being charged with neglect or elder abuse. What a world we live in! Even if you know it is crap, there isn't much you can do...you have to allow the 'professionals' to do their jobs and get the $$$$ out of the system.

I feel so much better now. Thanks for allowing me to vent.

One last thing, when her insurance changes 11/1, so does her doctor!

11 comments:

OrbsCorbs said...

Wow, Beejay, I feel sorry for you. I can empathize a little. Last week I took mom to the doctor because a visiting nurse said their was a problem with one of her feet. I didn't see a problem, and neither did mom, but I didn't want to contradict a medical professional. So I made an appointment and we went. The doctor didn't see anything wrong, either.

Sassa said...

Speaking from an elderly point of view..be sure she is comfortable with changing doctors. Even if you have to watch him like a hawk some people get attached to the same one all the time. Right now I am going thru dentists and I hate it. My old one doesn't take my insurance but I've been with him for ever. I hate the change. I understand what you are going thru. You don't know if 'something' is serious but then the elderly don't know either.

Beejay said...

thanks, guys, I know I'm in this for the long haul...

Orbs, at least the doctor was the right one in your case...mine has an incompetent doctor...grrrrr...so out she goes. Grandma will do what is good for her, thank goodness. And I have a friend who works for a great doctor and that's where Grandma will be going! Oh, by the way, I think she has now learned to tell me FIRST! She was exhausted and they want to use therapy to strenghten her??? Come on!

SER said...

Damn Beejay, I swear the older I get the more horror story I hear AND it all involves money, money, money! Bastards......

kkdither said...

Thank goodness she is able to be mobile enough to be with you. Once you get into nursing care, it is a whole new level of crazy. My mom wound up with open bed sores because they let her constantly sit in wet briefs. (diapers) I was not informed of these sores until she was placed into the hospital. They put an air mattress on the bed and kept her clean and dry. The sores healed right up.

As she returned from the hospital, the nursing home refused to use the air bed... even though we paid over $600.00 in medicare costs to purchase it and the doctor prescribed its use. They said it was an added risk of her slipping out of the bed. Ya sure! They actually threw it out. I was hopping mad. The second time (yes, second purchase) I carried it in and they finally put it on the bed, after much carping.

The medication used on our elderly is always suspect. They are overly drugged. I asked routinely for the list of my mom's medications. At times she was totally incoherent due to sleeping pills and strong pain medication she really didn't need.

The tests performed on the elderly are often ridiculous and sometimes criminal, as you have found. I read somewhere that an 88 year old woman was given a routine pap smear when she was in the hospital with a totally unrelated issue... the responsible person in charge (her son) was mortified as she was already diagnosed with a life ending illness and was very frail and near the end. I'm sure it was done to pad the bill.

All I can say is be vigilant. Watch everything. Read what you can and be forceful. Everyone needs an advocate for when they are not able to function. The nursing homes, doctors and hospitals and care providers don't want you to know what is going on.

Why Not? said...

wow, sounds awful.. I just got done with my clinicals which was at a service house for the elderly. I have to say one of the most rewarding experiences in my life. I am sure there are horror stories here as well, but as far as I could see these elderly were treated very well and was told so by the actual patients and family of the patients. Because of the socialized medicine you do not come across unnecessary tests or padding of the bills. When people are end of life and reach what they call the breaking point (the point in which care is only to make the patient comfortable this is done with the patients and families consent no death panels here) they will only give the medications that they are comfortable with taking (any tablets that are hard to swallow they take away), give you medication to calm you and take away the pain. I have been very impressed with the care these elderly have received.

I know a lot of people think that socialized medicine is a terrible thing and maybe in some parts of the world it is but here in Sweden I have always been impressed with the help I have seen given and have myself received.

While I was there they did a medication evaluation where a nurse, doctor and pharmacist all sat down and went through each of the patients and really looked at what medications the patient was taking. Looked how they were interacting with eachother (they took an evaluation of each patient kidney status, blood pressure and overall well being) and took away medications that were not good for them changed medications to something else that would work better.. I thought it was a very smart thing as it is very easy to just add on medications without thinking how they interact with each other.

Beejay said...

kk, when I saw my gynecologist last spring, she told me about being called in to evaluate a 92 year old woman with an ovarian tumor. My doctor told them that she would NOT perform surgery on a 92 year old woman. This woman also was in for another terminal disease and this was discovered along the way. It's nuts. Just plain nuts out there.

OrbsCorbs said...

"All I can say is be vigilant. Watch everything. Read what you can and be forceful. Everyone needs an advocate for when they are not able to function. The nursing homes, doctors and hospitals and care providers don't want you to know what is going on."

I agree with those words, kk. I can't even count the times that I have interceded on my mother's behalf with healthcare people. I have caught a number of outright mistakes that make me shudder. I have also lost considerable respect for the healthcare "industry." Part of my walking out on my shrink was due to this - I'm tired of getting poorer performance from doctors than from auto mechanics.

Why Not, it sounds pretty nice over there. Can I retire to Sweden?

Why Not? said...

Come on over.. but for all the positives there are plenty of negatives.. people complain of gas prices over there.. we can't even afford a drivers license.. much less a car to fill with extremely expensive gas.. gotta pay for that great care one way or another I guess..

Beejay said...

I spoke with my sister in law tonight, who is an Occupational Therapist...she gave me a heads up on who to call and what to say...if Grandma will agree to it, I'm pulling the plug on the OT...an injury that is over 10 years old will not respond. The PT will get a crack at her next week, but then that's it!

So instead of quality of life, they try to drain then physically, emotionally and financially!

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