Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my September brides and grooms!  How are you?  Did you enjoy your Labor Day weekend?  The weather cooperated.  “They” are saying that we will hit the 90’s again this week.  I suggest that we all stock up on as much sunshine as possible before winter’s gloom.  Wouldn’t it be nice if we could bank sunny days?  I wouldn’t mind a few days of winter weather here and there if it meant we could trot out some sunny days in January and February.  Well, I wouldn’t even ask Mother Nature.  I think she’s gone completely psychotic.

September already.  Boo-hoo.  This is the month that can run hot as a coal mine and then suddenly switch to autumn mode.  If our weather pattern persists, we’re going to be cold.  The children have returned to the schools, so please keep an eye out for them and the school buses.  As the days grow shorter and the nights lengthen, the kids will be harder to see.  I dislike the way the winter sun slides down in the southern sky.  The glare can be deadly.  Oh my, so much negativity.  Let us give thanks for what we have.

Our enchanted and endearing Green Bay Packers ended their preseason on a negative note.  Actually, 3 negative notes to one positive.  The coaches don’t sound worried, though.  May they guide our stimulating Packers to victory in their season opener against the San Francisco 49ers this Sunday, September 8.  The game starts at 3:25 p.m. in Candlestick Park.  Fox TV network will provide coverage.  Hopefully, the Packers will provide a win.  Go Pack!  Mutilate the 49ers!  Destroy their women and children!

There was a little excitement in the Zoltar household yesterday.  We’re having electrical problems and Señor Zanza insisted that he knew what he was doing when he started working on the circuit breaker box. I wanted to hire a professional electrician, but Señor Zanza said no, he could do it.  That was about the last thing he said before a large arc of electricity exploded from the box, sending Señor Zanza flying across the room.  There also was a huge bang and acrid-smelling smoke.  Oh my.   When we got Señor Zanza home from the emergency room, he agreed to let a professional do it.  The soonest we could get one is tomorrow.  Right now, our house has power only in the kitchen and one receptacle in the living room.  Thank goodness that the refrigerator is running.  We’ve run extension cords all over the place to get power where we want it, but we have to be careful not to overload the circuit.  It reminds me of that Green Acres episode where Lisa was allowed to plug in only certain appliances at one time.  Our bathroom has no power, so I put a candle in there.  I hope the boys can aim by candlelight.  The big boy, Señor Zanza, should be alright after a night’s rest.  Sometimes when you try to save a few dollars by doing it yourself, you end up spending twice as much.

Finally, my dears, I have to put in my two cents worth on the subject of Syria.  I rarely talk about international affairs.  What I can say about the current situation is that Syria is a trap for the United States.  I predict that if we get involved, we will sorely regret it.  Indeed, we have regretted almost every military intervention that we have staged over the last 60 years.  Stay away, Mr. President Obama!  Our sons and daughters should never have to fight for any country except ours.  Bring our troops home!

Thank you, lads and lassies, for reading my blog today.  The more visitors, the better.  I love company and I love the JT Irregulars.

Need electrical help? Don’t contact: madamezoltar@jtirregulars.com

Have a glorious week, my friends.  There’s still fun to be had outdoors.  Enjoy it while we can.  To all of our children’s teachers: thank you.  Mogigraphia!