Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my SweeTARTS® and Smarties®!  How are you?  The brisk mornings are becoming common.  We’ve already had a taste of snow.  Then there was that awful rain and windstorm the other day.  I feel bad for the people in the Midwest who lost their homes to high winds and tornadoes.  Some lost their lives.  Meteorologists are calling it “the worst storm in a century.”   Oh dear, what a dishonor.

Well, we in Wisconsin all know that the Packers lost again last Sunday.  Tut-tut.  This Sunday they face the team that what’s-his-name defected to when he betrayed Green Bay, the Minnesota Vikings. Boo!  Hiss!  Our majestic Packers are riddled with injuries. Mr. Rodgers is making more money than anyone has ever made sitting on a bench.  (I know, he rarely sits.)  I hope he took my advice (and tonic) for healing.  I’m transmitting psychic balm to him.

In the Irregular Football League, my Screaming Psychics soundly trounced Mr. OrbsCorbs’ Orbliterators, dropping him to fourth place while elevating me to second.  Mr. Hale-Bopp’s Half-Astrophysicists have been in first place since the get go and appear to be undefeatable.  That won’t stop me from trying.

Next week, of course, is Thanksgiving.  Gobble-gobble.  People are beginning to decorate their homes for the holidays.  I’m going to try to talk Señor Zanza into climbing onto our roof and putting up a gorgeous display.  Junior can help him.  I want our home to shine like a Las Vegas casino.  Gaudy isn’t gaudy if you gaudy it up enough.  When the FAA complains about our lights interfering with flights, then we have enough.  I want to make sure that Santa Claus can find our house.  I hope we don’t blind him.

If Black Friday starts earlier and earlier on Thanksgiving Day, shouldn’t it be Black Thanksgiving, too?  That’s just a silly joke to help counter the crass commercialism that has crept into our holidays.  Actually, the commercialism is choking our holidays to death.  “Party on!” as Mr. OrbsCorbs would say.

Here is an ad from Kmart that rings in the holiday season:

Wasn’t that something? 

Happy holidays to all of you.  Thank you for reading my blog.  I hope that it’s as much fun to read as it is to write.  We are friends forever.

What’s on your mind?  I already know: madamezoltar@jtirregulars.com

Bundle up against the cold, my dears.  Remember that those you meet are fighting their own battles in life.  By treating each other with respect, we make it easier to get along in this world.  I love you all.  Bavardage!