Saturday, April 13, 2013
"Comic Legend Jonathan Winters Dies at 87"
That's too bad. I liked his comedy, but I haven't seen him perform in years.
Please RSVP :)
An email was sent yesterday with
the info for our next get-together.
If you did not receieve it,
PLEASE let me know
so I can try again.
Please RSVP here
so we have a rough head count.
thanks!!
Racine Transparency
Racine Transparency is in our sidebar list of Local & Area Blogs. Give it a look.
Friday, April 12, 2013
7 Degrees of Blondness
FIRST DEGREE
A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning.
The very blonde wife picked up the phone, listened a moment and said 'How
should I know, that's 200 miles from here!' and hung up.
The husband said, 'Who was that?'
The wife answered, 'I don't know, some woman wanting to know if the coast
is clear.'
SECOND DEGREE
Two blondes are walking down the street.
One notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up.
She opens it, looks in the mirror and says, 'Hmm, this person looks
familiar.'
The second blonde says, 'Here, let me see!' So, the first blonde hands her
the compact.
The second blonde looks in the mirror and says, 'You dummy, it's me!'
THIRD DEGREE
A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and
buys a gun.
She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she
finds him in the arms of a redhead.
Well, the blonde is really angry.
She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is
overcome with grief.
She takes the gun and puts it to her head.
The boyfriend yells, 'No, honey, don't do it!!!'
The blonde replies, 'Shut up, you're next!'
FOURTH DEGREE
A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals.
She proudly says, 'Go ahead, ask me, ... I know 'em all.'
A friend says, 'OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin?'
The blonde replies,'Oh, that's easy .. it's W.'
FIFTH DEGREE
Q: What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?
A: 'Is it mine?'
SIXTH DEGREE
Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA Freshman, sat in her US
government class.
The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about.
Bambi pondered the question; then, finally, said, 'That was the decision
George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware.'
SEVENTH DEGREE
Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked
and burglarized.
She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime.
The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit,
patrolling nearby, was the first to respond.
As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the
blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his
dog, then sat down on the steps.
Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, 'I come home to find all my
possessions stolen.
I call the police for help, and what do they do?
They send me a BLIND policeman!'
EVEN IF YOU ARE BLONDE YOU HAVE TO LOVE THIS:
Two blondes were sipping their Starbucks when a truck went past loaded up
with rolls of sod.
"I'm going to do that when I win the lottery," announced #1 Blonde.
"Do what?" asked #2 Blonde .
"Send my lawn out to be mowed."
A married couple were asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning.
The very blonde wife picked up the phone, listened a moment and said 'How
should I know, that's 200 miles from here!' and hung up.
The husband said, 'Who was that?'
The wife answered, 'I don't know, some woman wanting to know if the coast
is clear.'
SECOND DEGREE
Two blondes are walking down the street.
One notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up.
She opens it, looks in the mirror and says, 'Hmm, this person looks
familiar.'
The second blonde says, 'Here, let me see!' So, the first blonde hands her
the compact.
The second blonde looks in the mirror and says, 'You dummy, it's me!'
THIRD DEGREE
A blonde suspects her boyfriend of cheating on her, so she goes out and
buys a gun.
She goes to his apartment unexpectedly and when she opens the door she
finds him in the arms of a redhead.
Well, the blonde is really angry.
She opens her purse to take out the gun, and as she does so, she is
overcome with grief.
She takes the gun and puts it to her head.
The boyfriend yells, 'No, honey, don't do it!!!'
The blonde replies, 'Shut up, you're next!'
FOURTH DEGREE
A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals.
She proudly says, 'Go ahead, ask me, ... I know 'em all.'
A friend says, 'OK, what's the capital of Wisconsin?'
The blonde replies,'Oh, that's easy .. it's W.'
FIFTH DEGREE
Q: What did the blonde ask her doctor when he told her she was pregnant?
A: 'Is it mine?'
SIXTH DEGREE
Bambi, a blonde in her fourth year as a UCLA Freshman, sat in her US
government class.
The professor asked Bambi if she knew what Roe vs. Wade was about.
Bambi pondered the question; then, finally, said, 'That was the decision
George Washington had to make before he crossed the Delaware.'
SEVENTH DEGREE
Returning home from work, a blonde was shocked to find her house ransacked
and burglarized.
She telephoned the police at once and reported the crime.
The police dispatcher broadcast the call on the radio, and a K-9 unit,
patrolling nearby, was the first to respond.
As the K-9 officer approached the house with his dog on a leash, the
blonde ran out on the porch, shuddered at the sight of the cop and his
dog, then sat down on the steps.
Putting her face in her hands, she moaned, 'I come home to find all my
possessions stolen.
I call the police for help, and what do they do?
They send me a BLIND policeman!'
EVEN IF YOU ARE BLONDE YOU HAVE TO LOVE THIS:
Two blondes were sipping their Starbucks when a truck went past loaded up
with rolls of sod.
"I'm going to do that when I win the lottery," announced #1 Blonde.
"Do what?" asked #2 Blonde .
"Send my lawn out to be mowed."
"Journal Times editorial: Aldermen don't need weapons"
From The Journal Times.com:
"When it
passed a new ordinance banning weapons in city buildings last week, the
City Council also sent a message to all Racine citizens: Our safety is
more important than yours.
"That’s not only a curious message, it’s an arrogant one.
"If city aldermen buy into the argument that their safety is at issue unless they’re allowed to carry a gun into the council chambers to protect themselves, why should a state-licensed concealed carry permit holder have any less rights to defend themselves?
"Like many of the disputes around guns and gun controls, we get inflamed rhetoric, emotions and few facts.
"Alderman Greg Helding, who proposed that aldermen be exempted from the ban on weapons in city buildings, argued that the exemption was justified because elected officials can be marked as targets.
"He compared aldermen to courtrooms where judges and district attorneys are allowed to carry concealed weapons.
"We would submit that judges and district attorneys are usually dealing with accused criminals and not the interested citizens who normally appear in the council gallery. Moreover, judges and district attorneys are in the business of assessing life-affecting penalties — putting convicted criminals behind bars for years — or making decisions on things like the custody of children.
"That’s not the same as deciding who gets a streetlight, a zoning variance or a city permit, and Helding and the rest of the council members know that.
"No doubt aldermen get threats from time to time — we get them in the newspaper business as well. But, unless we missed it, aldermen offered up no proof of a history of serious threats of death or violence against them during the debates on this issue. Nor do we recall any incidents of gunplay in the council chambers in the past few decades.
"Indeed, one could suggest that aldermen themselves have demonstrated more of a propensity toward violence than gallery onlookers, given the recent criminal accusations against a couple of the council members. Perhaps the safest course would be to have a uniformed police officer handing out weapons to citizens when they enter the gallery.
"We’re not seriously suggesting that, of course.
"But we are serious about suggesting this is merely an exercise in arrogance.
"If the City Council meetings pose a real danger of armed violence, then the council should address it either by adding a uniformed police officer to the council chambers on meeting nights or enforcing the ban by adding weapon detectors at City Hall.
"That would provide a better defense than armed aldermen and flimsy decals on the City Hall doors."
http://journaltimes.com/news/opinion/editorial/journal-times-editorial-aldermen-don-t-need-weapons/article_5de7a2fe-a2fb-11e2-8df3-0019bb2963f4.html
I about choked when I read the above. I did a double take to make sure it was the Journal Times. This editorial is a sensible response to the hysteria and lies that have been coming from City Hall. I still find it hard to believe that it's in the Journal Times.
If you have been threatened online, please, please, please provide examples. You know, if someone threatens you online, you can get a judge to order the release of the IP address and account name of the perpetrator. So why haven't you done that? Or is this like Dickert's "embezzler"? Making claims with no supporting evidence, so the lie just hangs there in the air, stinking up everything. If Dickert knows of an embezzler, he is morally bound to give that information to prosecutors. Same for online threats. As a member of Racine's blogging community, I don't want people making online threats anymore than Helding or Kaplan do. So please just point out where you were threatened. Please, please, don't let this be another administration lie. Racine is really hurting and we can't take much more of your dishonesty.
P.S. Here is a story and video from FOX6 wherein Alderman Kaplan claims that threats have been made online: http://fox6now.com/2013/04/03/racine-officials-want-to-exempt-themselves-from-gun-ban/
Here is Racine Exposed's response to Kaplan: http://racineexposed.wordpress.com/2013/04/12/my-shot/
"That’s not only a curious message, it’s an arrogant one.
"If city aldermen buy into the argument that their safety is at issue unless they’re allowed to carry a gun into the council chambers to protect themselves, why should a state-licensed concealed carry permit holder have any less rights to defend themselves?
"Like many of the disputes around guns and gun controls, we get inflamed rhetoric, emotions and few facts.
"Alderman Greg Helding, who proposed that aldermen be exempted from the ban on weapons in city buildings, argued that the exemption was justified because elected officials can be marked as targets.
"He compared aldermen to courtrooms where judges and district attorneys are allowed to carry concealed weapons.
"We would submit that judges and district attorneys are usually dealing with accused criminals and not the interested citizens who normally appear in the council gallery. Moreover, judges and district attorneys are in the business of assessing life-affecting penalties — putting convicted criminals behind bars for years — or making decisions on things like the custody of children.
"That’s not the same as deciding who gets a streetlight, a zoning variance or a city permit, and Helding and the rest of the council members know that.
"No doubt aldermen get threats from time to time — we get them in the newspaper business as well. But, unless we missed it, aldermen offered up no proof of a history of serious threats of death or violence against them during the debates on this issue. Nor do we recall any incidents of gunplay in the council chambers in the past few decades.
"Indeed, one could suggest that aldermen themselves have demonstrated more of a propensity toward violence than gallery onlookers, given the recent criminal accusations against a couple of the council members. Perhaps the safest course would be to have a uniformed police officer handing out weapons to citizens when they enter the gallery.
"We’re not seriously suggesting that, of course.
"But we are serious about suggesting this is merely an exercise in arrogance.
"If the City Council meetings pose a real danger of armed violence, then the council should address it either by adding a uniformed police officer to the council chambers on meeting nights or enforcing the ban by adding weapon detectors at City Hall.
"That would provide a better defense than armed aldermen and flimsy decals on the City Hall doors."
http://journaltimes.com/news/opinion/editorial/journal-times-editorial-aldermen-don-t-need-weapons/article_5de7a2fe-a2fb-11e2-8df3-0019bb2963f4.html
I about choked when I read the above. I did a double take to make sure it was the Journal Times. This editorial is a sensible response to the hysteria and lies that have been coming from City Hall. I still find it hard to believe that it's in the Journal Times.
If you have been threatened online, please, please, please provide examples. You know, if someone threatens you online, you can get a judge to order the release of the IP address and account name of the perpetrator. So why haven't you done that? Or is this like Dickert's "embezzler"? Making claims with no supporting evidence, so the lie just hangs there in the air, stinking up everything. If Dickert knows of an embezzler, he is morally bound to give that information to prosecutors. Same for online threats. As a member of Racine's blogging community, I don't want people making online threats anymore than Helding or Kaplan do. So please just point out where you were threatened. Please, please, don't let this be another administration lie. Racine is really hurting and we can't take much more of your dishonesty.
P.S. Here is a story and video from FOX6 wherein Alderman Kaplan claims that threats have been made online: http://fox6now.com/2013/04/03/racine-officials-want-to-exempt-themselves-from-gun-ban/
Here is Racine Exposed's response to Kaplan: http://racineexposed.wordpress.com/2013/04/12/my-shot/
How Bad The Flood Is Around Here!
I was out this morning doing some errands and I decided to go and investigate how bad the flooding was around here. I haven't finish with the investigating yet. But I decided since I had to come home and drop some things off I would post some pictures for everyone to see. This is what I have taken so far.
This is at Prichard Park
This is on Hwy H north of Spring St.
This is Nicholson Wildlife Refuge
This is the Root River on 5 Mile Rd
This is the Root River on 5 Mile Rd
This is the Root River on the other side of 5 Mile Rd
I will be taking more picture of the Root River on Northwestern and by Spring St. today before I pick Drew up from work. I just can't believe that the last few days did this to our city. According to the weather people on the news we only got four inches of rain. I say B.S. to the weather people on how much rain we have gotten because this is more than what they say. More pictures to come!
Four for Fridays
Hello everyone! Welcome back to Four for Fridays! It has been a long, dreary and gloomy week. I have been been feeling much like the weather. Looking forward to some sunshine. Anyways, some questions for you....
1) If you could spend five minutes with the president, what would you talk about?
2) What is your favorite phrase?
3) What three adjectives that best describe you?
4) Do you like roller coasters?
Enjoy your weekend!
1) If you could spend five minutes with the president, what would you talk about?
2) What is your favorite phrase?
3) What three adjectives that best describe you?
4) Do you like roller coasters?
Enjoy your weekend!
Thursday, April 11, 2013
Wednesday, April 10, 2013
Scroogled.com
Scroogled.com is a site operated by Microsoft that attacks Google, primarily over privacy issues. "Why can't we all just get along?"
Milwaukee Keeps Pooping in Our Lake
Thank you, Milwaukee, for continuing to pump your raw sewage into our lake. They've had decades to deal with this problem, but not enough politicians have been bribed, so Milwaukeeans pee and poop in our lake. Tons of pee and poop. I suggest putting sewage on the desks of city "leaders." Why can't Milwaukee keep up? No other cities on the lake pump raw sewage into it. Why are they allowed to?
Dear Madame Zoltar
Hello, my drenched dears!
How are you? The weather
continues to be a screwed up mess, and not just in Racine. “They” are even predicting snow for later
this week. Nobody is predicting when
spring-like weather will occur. Maybe it
will be cold and damp for months, and then we’ll swing right back into
winter. Oh my, I hope not.
I was saddened to hear that our Ms. kk is feeling under the
weather. With this weather, that says a
lot. I have been pinging you with
psychic good vibrations, my dear. You should
feel better shortly. I’m also sending
out good vibes to Ms. Tender Heart Bear.
I know that it’s very discouraging to look for a job these days,
especially in Racine with the
consistently highest unemployment rate in the state. Buck up, dear, good things will come to pass
your way. It’s all a cycle, it’s all
connected.
I’ve taken note of the brouhaha occurring at City Hall over
concealed carry weapons. First, there
was the “executive order” from Mr. Mayor Dickert blocking all guns from City
Hall. Now the City Council has voted
that elected officials with concealed carry licenses can carry a gun, but no
regular citizen may. The
justification? Some of them feel
“threatened.” Oh, my Lord, welcome to
the real world. I feel threatened
whenever I leave or enter my house. I’m
much more worried about some meth or crack head toting a gun in my neighborhood
than I am worried about a citizen attending a City Council meeting with a
concealed weapon. How many quick draws
do we have on our Council? If someone
comes in spraying lead, how many will he kill before an alderman takes him
down? Someone has been watching too many
Steven Seagal movies.
I also received an anonymous email this week:
Dear Madame Zoltar,
How can I convert myself to the Dark Side? Instead of complaining about city government,
I’ve decided to join them in the fleecing of the citizens. So, what do I do now? Should I ring up Dickert and announce that
I’m on his side? If so, would it be rude
to ask about money at that time? Or should
I wait and just accept whatever they offer me?
I need to do this quickly because I’m broke and the bills have to be
paid.
Please advise me at your earliest convenience.
Respectfully,
OC
Dear OC, are you sure you want to lose your eternal soul in
exchange for dirty money? Believe me, it
looks like fun now, but when it comes time to pay the piper, there is hell to
pay. Satan has no mercy. There will never be an end to your misery in
the afterlife. Maybe you’ll have to
watch City Council meetings for eternity.
How gruesome!
Think it over, OC.
Let me know what you decide.
Thank you everyone for visiting my blog today. I love my Irregulars and regulars and odds
and ends. You make my day.
You can’t handle the truth: madamezoltar@jtirregulars.com
Try to enjoy this weather.
There’s not much else we can do about it. Take care of each other. Live and learn and love. Make peace, not war. Verbile!
Tuesday, April 9, 2013
STRUCTURAL ENGINEERING IN ACTION
Whether you're a "bird person" or not, this is
stunning!!! Not to detract from the sheer magic of it, but in practical
terms, how many trips would a bird have to make with that tiny
little quantity of mud/clay it could carry? (and how far from the nest is the source?)
If you take the construction of a "circular bowl"
in your stride as instinctive – how the heck does the bird come up with the windbreak/entrance design that shields the eggs/chicks from the elements – and at what point in fashioning the bowl do they start to construct it?
All Photos are property of Daniel Carbajal Solsona and
posted WITHOUT his permission….SER.
In The Dark
Wife: Oh, come on.
Husband: Leave me alone!
Wife: It won't take long.
Husband: I won't be able to sleep afterwards.
Wife: I can't sleep without it.
Husband: Why do you think of things like this in the
middle of the night?
Wife: Because I'm Hot.
Husband: You get hot at the darnest times.
Wife: If you love me I wouldn't have to beg you.
Husband: If you love me you'd be more considerate.
Wife: You don't love me anymore.
Husband: Yes I do, but let's forget it for tonight.
Wife: (Sob-Sob)
Husband: All right, I'll do it.
Wife: What's the matter? Need a flashlight?
Husband: I can't find it.Wife:
Oh, for heaven's sake, feel for it!
Husband: There! Are you satisfied?
Wife: Oh, yes, honey.
Husband: Is it down far enough?
Wife: Oh, that's fine.
Husband: Now go to sleep. The next time, it's your turn
to get up and turn the thermostat down.
Wife: Yes, Honey
Wife: Yes, Honey
Seen This And Could Not Resist!
SER this is just for you. Why didn't you tell us about the new movie. I hope the Mrs. knows about it is she going to be in the movie and the little tots too? SER you gotta love me for this one!
This was on the back of a bus in Milwaukee when Drew and I went to Grant Park the other day. I just couldn't resist this one.
This was on the back of a bus in Milwaukee when Drew and I went to Grant Park the other day. I just couldn't resist this one.
An Oldie, But A Goodie
*CAUTION: ADULT LANGUAGE ADVISORY*
That's something I haven't seen before: an honest used car salesman.
That's something I haven't seen before: an honest used car salesman.
Monday, April 8, 2013
"caspa vagina bubbles from hell!!.mpg"
My mom taught me to avoid Vagina Bubbles from Hell, and all other STDs, too.
Spring Migration
The threshold of winter has already begun to lose its grip across Southeastern Wisconsin. The warmth of the April sun has been melting ice and snow, flooding the country farmlands into ponds and streams. The landscape is stark and barren, browned and dusky green. Somewhere the buds are pushing up to kiss the sunlight, but not just yet....
The floodgates have opened. A multitude of birds have arrived and are passing through. The spring migration is here! Aside from the obvious hordes of Robins and Red Winged Blackbirds that are congregating on the countrysides, I've seen dozens of Tundra Swans, Wilson's Snipes, rafts of Canvasbacks, Ringed Necked Ducks, Ruddy Ducks and Northern Shovelers making the flooded farm fields their pit.stop. I've seen Red Breasted Mergansers and Redheads in the harbor, with their plumage all colorful are bright, courting away. The Sandhill Cranes, Eastern Meadowlarks and Killdeer have arrived, overtaking the open fields. Tree Swallows, Eastern Phoebes, Hermit Thrushes and Great Egrets are trickling in. Pretty soon the warblers, the catbirds, the flycatchers and the orioles will arrive... It's only the beginning!
The war between spring and winter isn't over yet! Jack Frost still has his stronghold over the northern parts of the state. The lakes are still frozen and the land snow covered, thus creating a paradox. A natural traffic jam of sorts. A gridlock. The Common Redpolls, Dark Eyed Juncos and the American Tree Sparrows should be gone by now. They are still around. It is perplexing to even the most seasoned birder to see a junco and a swallow in the same field....
A few seem to have escaped the borders already... The famous Great Grey Owls of Mauston and Middleton have fled the paparazzi of photographers, after making the winter the biggest owl migration since 2005. The Rough Legged Hawks, Northern Shrikes and Snowy Owls are nowhere to be seen. Let's hope their journey home is a success.
So the time is now to keep an eye on the skies, Rare birds are more common in this time of the year as winds may carry them to strange lands. Never know, one could up in your back yard!
About these pics... The top pic is an Eastern Bluebird taken at Grant Park in South Milwaukee on 4 7 2013. The top middle one are Northern Shovelers taken at the pond on 2 Mile Rd in Raymond. The bottom middle one is a Sandhill Crane taken at Bong on 4 4 2013. Below is a Barred Owl taken Up North at my folk's place on 3 30 2013
"It's official: penis size does matter"
"After aeons of speculation, science has finally answered the biggest question of all - Does penis size matter? - with a resounding 'yes'.
"Australian researchers have found that penis size is just as important as height when it comes to female assessment of male attractiveness, and that bigger is indeed better - to a point.
"The results of the study, which asked a group of women to rate the attractiveness of a series of computer-generated images of varied height, body shape and penis size, are published today in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Science .
"'We found that flaccid penis size had a significant influence on male attractiveness,' the authors write.
"'Males with a larger penis were rated as being relatively more attractive.'
"'Our results directly contradict claims that penis size is unimportant to most females.'"
Read more: http://www.abc.net.au/science/articles/2013/04/09/3732272.htm
I knew it.
Sunday, April 7, 2013
"Best of Web 4 - HD - Zapatou"
This video is ten minutes long, but it has loads of interesting images.
Useless Information
The costume Tina Turner wore as Aunty Entity, the ruthless, determined ruler of Bartertown in the movie Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome weighted 75 lbs.