Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my Post Toasties.  How are you?  The relatively cool evening temperatures are a rarity for August.  Usually by now, the sun has burnt a hole into your head and the lawns start going dormant.  I’m not complaining.  That’s coming, anyway.  I’m just trying to figure out how to make the warm weather stay for a few weeks, or months, more.  There will be more heat to come.  It’s only early August.

Maybe we can set off a few nuclear bombs to shift the Earth’s orbit and make this a more temperate zone.  Off course, that isn’t fair to those who currently are in the more moderate zone.  Maybe we can shift the orbit every month or so to give everyone a taste of different climes.  The clothing stores would love it.  Meteorologists would hate it.  I must admit that a month of artic weather frightens me.  Then, BOOM, it’s tropical weather for another month.  I don’t know, the weather is unpredictable enough as it is.  You know that old standard, “You don’t like the weather?”  This is Wisconsin.  It’ll change in 20 minutes. I’ve heard that used for just about every state in the union, and some smaller quadrants of Andromeda. 

I know!  Let’s build a big drilling ship to “journey to the center of the Erath,” and then back out the other side.  That will ventilate the planet and cool down the global warming.  How is it that thousands of civilians have solutions to some of our most pesky problems, but they’re not tried because the creators are not certified or “official,” or lack diplomas?  Common sense could solve hundreds, if not thousands, of problems in Congress, but they don’t want to lose their meal tickets.  While we banter about with our silly little lives, Congress gives itself the royal treatment at our expense.  They don’t have to deal with any of our petty problems.  They live like Kings and Queens, and we’re their pawns.

Here’s some possible good news: “Legislation would give municipalities authority to decide whether roundabouts get built” - http://journaltimes.com/news/local/legislation-would-give-municipalities-authority-to-decide-whether-roundabouts-get/article_8ed0c567-22f7-5132-b20f-bf7e3f2252bc.html Imagine that!  How wacky!  Letting the people who live in a community make up their own minds on community issues is unheard of.  This could lead to bigger problems like taxpayers wanting a say in how their money is spent.  Nip it in the bud, I say, nip it in the bud.

I’ve been sending out good vibes to all of my friends, Irregular and otherwise.  We need something to combat the propaganda spoon fed to us everyday.  I pray and I hope that people in the United States someday come to their senses and demand an accounting from their so-called leaders.

Where to put a roundabout? Ask: MadameZoltar@jtirregulars.com

“They” are saying seasonable temperatures for today and the rest of the week.  So get out and enjoy yourselves.  Be careful. Never underestimate stupidity’s (including yours) ability to escalate an issue.  I love you all!