JT IRREGULARS: 12/10/17

Saturday, December 16, 2017

"WiGWAG: Chance the weatherman, Kim's karma, and more"

News with a twist

Lisa Neff and Louis Weisberg, Staff writers
Dec 14, 2017 Updated Dec 14, 2017

Chance the weatherman

Chance the Rapper made a surprise appearance as a guest weatherman on Chicago’s WGN 9 during the 15th annual WGN Morning News Toy Drive. The Grammy-winning artist is a Windy City native.

Don’t do this at home

Jay Swingler had gained more than 800,000 YouTube followers with videos of him doing insane things to himself. But he went too far when he cemented his head inside a microwave with Polyfilla, a quick-dry concrete. Although he wore a grocery bag over his head and used a breathing tube to avoid suffocation, his head got stuck in the oven. It took five firefighters, more than an hour to save his life. It’s all on YouTube.

Kim’s Karma

A gay man denied a marriage license by evangelical Kentucky county clerk Kim Davis has decided to challenge her re-election bid in 2018. Davis went to jail in 2015 for defying federal law by refusing to issue the license to David Ermold and his now-husband David Moore. That made Davis the martyr du jour of the Christian right, despite the fact she’s been married three times and conceived a child out of wedlock.

A ghastly affair

A 27-year-old “spiritual guidance counselor” in Bristol, England, told a British morning TV show that she’s had sex with at least 20 ghosts — and she prefers them to men. Her first experience came 12 years ago. She had just moved into a new house, where she felt the presence of a strange “energy” that later “became physical.” She said her affair with that ghost lasted three years and ended when her husband came home early from work and saw the shadowy shape of a man through the window.

Ho, ho, hot market

The value of Santa Claus’ North Pole home increased 6.5 percent over the past year to $710,559, according to a news release from Zillow. The cozy cabin, which boasts a floor-to-ceiling river-rock fireplace and a gourmet kitchen, is also equipped with a hot cocoa tap and an oven with 12 different cookie settings. To calculate the Zestimate of Santa’s home, Zillow looked at comparable homes in remote locations and applied a “Santa premium.” Zillow forecasts the value of Santa’s home will appreciate another 7 percent over the next year. But will he get to deduct his property taxes when April 15 rolls around?

Squirrellllll

Fans of National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation will chuckle. Officials in Sea Girt, New Jersey, were puzzled when wires to the town’s Christmas tree and display were found torn. Vandals? Nope. A squirrel. Police posted a photo of the culprit on Facebook and stated the squirrel was “charged with criminal mischief and released on bail.”

Counting steps

We came across these spectacular stats about the New York City Rockettes’ Christmas Spectacular: Rockettes must be ready to do 300 eye-high kicks a show. A Rockette burns about 1,000 calories every show. Between the “Parade of the Wooden Soldiers” and “New York at Christmas,” the Rockettes have 78 seconds to change socks, shoes, pants, jackets, gloves and hats. After the show, many dancers sit in a bath cooled by ice to about 45 degrees.

Publishing prize

Author Christopher Bollen recently won the Bad Sex in Fiction Prize for his novel The Destroyers. The thriller — set on a Greek island — has won critical praise, but Bad Sex judges crowned Bollen a winner for a passage comparing a male character’s genitalia to a billiard rack. Literary Review started the award in 1993 to spotlight “crude, badly written or perfunctory” passages of sexual description in fiction. The late John Updike was awarded a Bad Sex lifetime achievement award in 2008.

But warden …

The children’s book Where’s Waldo? Santa Spectacular is among the 10,000 books banned from Texas prisons. Harry Potter: Film Wizardry also is banned by the Texas Department of Criminal Justice, according to The Dallas Morning News. However, inmates can check out a copy of Adolf Hitler’s autobiography Mein Kampf and two books by former Ku Klux Klan Grand Wizard David Duke.

The lady doth protest too much?

In Pennsylvania, a male Republican state representative stunned his colleagues during a committee meeting when he went on a homophobic rant. After a male Democratic lawmaker tapped his arm to get his attention, he shouted, “Just, look, I’m a heterosexual. I have a wife, and I love my wife. I don’t like men, as you might, but stop touching me all the time.” Then, just for good measure, he added, “You have people on your side of the aisle that might like it. I don’t.” The bizarre incident was caught on video and created a stir on the internet, where most commenters pronounced him an obvious closet case.

Get more WigWAG at wisconsingazette.com/blogs/wigwag.

"Killdozer Helicopter News Footage"

It's the duty of every responsible citizen to do the same.

"For the Redneck in your life"

https://keystoneholiday.com/collections/novelty-lights/products/jingle-bell-shotgun-shells-10

http://knuckledraggin.com/2017/12/for-the-redneck-in-your-life/

Good Morning

"Man faces life in prison for killing girlfriend's molester, says he's 'not sorry'"

Brittany Monk and Jace Crehan. Monk faces up to 40 years in prison and Crehan faces a life sentence in the killing death of Monk's molester.

"A Louisiana man who faces a mandatory life term in prison after confessing to the brutal killing of his girlfriend’s convicted molester said he is “not sorry” for what he did.

"The Advocate reported that Jace Crehan was found guilty Thursday in the 2015 stabbing and strangling death of Robert Noce Jr, who was 47.

"Noce, a former boyfriend of Brittany Monk's mother, was reportedly sleeping in his trailer during the early morning attack. Crehan reportedly stuffed his body into a 55-gallon container.

"The report said that 13 days before the killing, Noce pleaded 'no contest' in Baton Rouge to sexually molesting Monk, 20.

"Monk reportedly admitted to participating in the killing while she was seven months pregnant, and pleaded guilty earlier this year to manslaughter. She faces up to 40 years.

"The report said it took the jury an hour to convict Crehan, who did not react at the verdict. His grandparents, who were reportedly in the courtroom, cried.

"'You don’t want people going out taking justice into their own hands,' Hillar Moore III, the district attorney, said. The report said his office declined attempts from Crehan to reduce the charges to manslaughter.

"Crehan’s lawyers, in the closing arguments, called the killing a revenge in the heat of the moment.
Crehan was heard on tape talking with authorities admitting to the crime.

"'I feel a lot better. It's not regret. Is it remorse? I'm not sorry for what I did,' he said, according to the report."

Someone needs to take out a few of these liberal judges. Things should straighten out then.

"A Minor Wrinkle"

Dear Village Board,

Cindy and I are VERY CONCERNED after learning that Foxconn CEO Terry Gou may be a DEADBEAT!

Much like Racine County Supervisor Monte Osterman, City of Racine Alderman Jeff Coe (who doesn't pay his property taxes), and now Foxconn CEO Terry Gou.

"However, a representative of the local governments said the problem is only a minor wrinkle arising from the complications of preparing necessary paperwork to create the account".

https://www.jsonline.com/story/money/business/2017/12/15/foxconn-misses-fund-deposit-deadline-but-source-says-its-minor-wrinkle/955238001/

SURE.... just Fox - CON the People to TRUST the Clueless Politicians and Greedy Corporations!

Please join Cindy and I is JUST SAYING NO to allowing Governor Scott Walker, Representatives Robin Vos, Cory Mason & MTP President David DeGroot to violate the Wisconsin Constitution (and their Oath of Office) by granting special rights to Corporate interests, stealing people’s property, destroying multi-generational Farms alongside an entire long established Community, loosening environmental protections, permitting heavy metals water pollution, instituting slave labor wages, providing taxpayer subsidies to multi-billionaire Corporations, and politician overreach.

https://concernedracinecountyresidentsjustsaynotofoxconn.wordpress.com/

Sincerely,

Tim & Cindy

"Deadline missed for $60 million Foxconn fund deposit, but source says it's a minor wrinkle"

Rick Romell, Milwaukee Journal Sentinel Published 6:01 p.m. CT Dec. 15, 2017 | Updated 6:42 p.m. CT Dec. 15, 2017

"A deadline came and went Friday for Foxconn Technology Group to deposit $60 million into a special account as specified by its contract with Mount Pleasant and Racine County.

"However, a representative of the local governments said the problem is only a minor wrinkle arising from the complications of preparing necessary paperwork to create the account.

"The account is expected to be established and the money deposited within the next few days, according to a joint statement late Friday afternoon from attorneys for the village, the county and Foxconn.

"'All parties are on the same page,' said the representative of the municipalities. '... Nobody has any concerns about it.'"

"... Nobody has any concerns about it." It's only $60 million.

"Dogfather’s Harley Davidson Sportster 883 Custom, Beginning to End"

https://timstoyymore.wordpress.com/2017/12/16/dogfathers-harley-davidson-sportster-883-custom-beginning-to-end/

Open Blog - Weekend

Everyone please have a good one.

Friday, December 15, 2017

"Wisconsin Foxconn Plant May Get $140M Electricity Project"

American Transmission Co. is asking state regulators to approve a $140 million project to supply electricity to the massive Foxconn manufacturing complex in southeastern Wisconsin.

Dec. 13, 2017, at 3:08 p.m.

MOUNT PLEASANT, Wis. (AP) — A utility company is asking state regulators to approve a $140 million project to supply electricity to the massive Foxconn manufacturing complex in southeastern Wisconsin.

American Transmission Co. says the massive plant is expected to draw six times more power than the next-largest factory in the state, the Milwaukee Journal Sentinel reported . ATC wants to build a new substation east of the facility and connect it with high-voltage power lines.

The company plans to file an application with the state Public Service Commission in February and seek a decision on the project by August.

Construction would begin late next year on the substation if the project is approved, ATC said. Transmission lines would be built in early 2019 and power would begin flowing by late 2019 or early 2020. The utility would need to acquire easements or use eminent domain authority to build the transmission lines.

The cost of the project would be spread among about 5 million residential electric customers over 40 years, the utility said.

"The typical residential customer would pay pennies per year over the life of the project," ATC spokeswoman Alissa Braatz said.

The utility doesn't operate the power-generating plants, but instead owns and runs the high-voltage systems that deliver electricity. Wisconsin utilities including We Energies, Wisconsin Public Service, Alliant Energy, Madison Gas & Electric and Superior Water, Light and Power co-own ATC.

Foxconn's $10 billion, 13,000-employee complex will be built in Mount Pleasant. The Taiwan-based company plans to manufacture advanced liquid crystal display panels for commercial and consumer uses, including televisions.

___

Information from: Milwaukee Journal Sentinel, http://www.jsonline.com

Copyright 2017 The Associated Press

https://www.usnews.com/news/best-states/wisconsin/articles/2017-12-13/wisconsin-foxconn-plant-may-get-140m-electricity-project

The Evolution Of The Toys Air -Ride Compressors & Suspension

https://timstoyymore.wordpress.com/2017/12/15/the-evolution-of-the-toys-air-ride-compressors-suspension/

"Talking Racine Dissects the Fuzzy Math Behind the $765 Million Dollars Mt Pleasant and Racine County are Borrowing for the Foxconn Development"

Dear Village Board,

Cindy and I have just posted:

Link: https://concernedracinecountyresidentsjustsaynotofoxconn.wordpress.com/2017/12/15/talking-racine-dissects-the-fuzzy-math-behind-the-765-million-dollars-mt-pleasant-and-racine-county-are-borrowing-for-the-foxconn-development/

Please join Cindy and I is JUST SAYING NO to allowing Governor Scott Walker, Representatives Robin Vos, Cory Mason & MTP President David DeGroot to violate the Wisconsin Constitution (and their Oath of Office) by granting special rights to Corporate interests, stealing people’s property, destroying multi-generational Farms alongside an entire long established Community, loosening environmental protections, permitting heavy metals water pollution, instituting slave labor wages, providing taxpayer subsidies to multi-billionaire Corporations, and politician overreach.

Sincerely,

Tim & Cindy

"America's Painful Self-Delusion"

by Tyler Durden

Dec 14, 2017 10:45 PM

"Authored by Allen Marshall (Crimson Avenger) via Defiant Living blog,

"America is the only nation brought forth by a set of beliefs, and those beliefs, captured so eloquently in our founding documents, are some of the most powerful and inspiring ever conceived. We consider this to be the land of the free, where the individual is supreme and nothing prevents us from going as far as our talents can take us. That image of America – that 'brand' – is incredibly strong.

"However, there’s a very large gap between that long-held image and the reality of America today.

"What was once a government built for the people is now a government run for the rich and powerful, one that throws the people under the bus whenever their interests differ from those of the corporate and political leaders who run the show.

"And living in one world (the corrupt) while stubbornly believing you live in another (the ideal), despite mounds of evidence, causes a distinct kind of stress, often called cognitive dissonance.

"Psychologists suggest that when people are in a state of cognitive dissonance, they’ll search for a way to resolve it, either by rejecting one view or the other as either wrong or unimportant. If you’re a smoker looking at the link between smoking and cancer, for example, you’ll either quit smoking or decide that the research is biased, wrong, or doesn’t apply (in other words, that you’re smart enough to quit before the long-term damage is done)"

Read more: http://www.zerohedge.com/news/2017-12-14/americas-painful-self-delusion

"Humans Fight Back: San Fran Security Robot Attacked, Knocked Over, Smeared With Feces"

by Tyler Durden

Dec 15, 2017 3:45 AM

"Earlier today, we mentioned the bizarre story of a San Francisco animal shelter which was using a low cost, high-tech robot security guard to purge homeless people outside its facilities. The San Francisco SPCA branch had contracted Knightscope to provide a K5 robot (the same model which in July committed suicide at a mall fountain) for securing the outdoor spaces of the animal shelter.

"Why use a robot to chase away humans? Simple: money - it costs the SPCA $7/hour to rent the robot, about $3 less than the minimum wage in California, and according to San Francisco Business Times, the robot was deployed as a 'way to try dealing with the growing number of needles, car break-ins and crime that seemed to emanate from nearby tent encampments of homeless people.'"

"County investigating apparent suicide at juvenile at detention facility"

Journal Times staff
4 hrs ago

"RACINE — Racine County officials confirmed that a death occurred in the Racine County Juvenile Detention Center on Sunday.

"The Racine County Sheriff’s Office is investigating the death with full cooperation of the Detention Center staff and supervisors, according to a Racine County news advisory.

"The release stated the death was an apparent suicide.

"'We are devastated,' said Hope Otto, Racine County Human Services director. 'We consider kids in our juvenile detention program like family, and we take very seriously the responsibility of protecting and improving the lives of our youth.'

"The juvenile was found unresponsive in her cell during the night. Life-saving measures were immediately performed by detention staff.

"No further information is available at this time due to the ongoing investigation.

"'This is the first such occurrence in the history of the Racine County Juvenile Detention Center,' Otto said. 'We also know it doesn’t compare to what this child’s family is going through. We extend our deepest condolences to family and friends and will continue to work with them as the investigation continues.'

"The Detention Center is located in the county’s Dennis Kornwolf Service Center located at 1717 Taylor Ave."

http://journaltimes.com/news/local/county-investigating-apparent-suicide-at-juvenile-at-detention-facility/article_c9cac6f7-f0ce-5cbb-8a99-bfff01d3a784.html

Four for Fridays!

I hope everyone is staying warm. I have been so busy this past week I forgot to post my Christmas pictures I am so sorry about that. I am going to try to get them posted this weekend in between making the last few batches of cookies. Here are your questions.

1) Do you feel more stressed out during the Christmas season?

2) Do you still have last minute shopping to get done before next weekend?

3) So you do more of your shopping online or go to the stores?

4) Do you have a lot of traveling to do for Christmas?

I hope everyone stays warm and has a great weekend!

Open Blog - Friday

Friday's not bad even if you aren't in love.

Thursday, December 14, 2017

"Dennis Rodman: Kim Jong Un Is ‘Probably’ A Madman"

“But I didn’t see that.”

"Dennis Rodman opened up about his bizarre friendship with North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un on Wednesday’s broadcast of 'The Late Show.'

"The NBA Hall of Famer told host Stephen Colbert that his despotic pal was more than likely unhinged, but claimed not to have seen that side of him during their multiple meetings over the last four years.

"'It’s funny though that I don’t see how people can sit there and say this person a 'madman,' said Rodman.

"'He probably is, but I didn’t see that. He probably is,' he added.

"Colbert also pressed Rodman on whether Kim, who has been exchanging bellicose threats with U.S. President Donald Trump, actually wants to start a nuclear war.

"Rodman insisted that the man he calls 'The Marshal' doesn’t.

"'He’s more like a kid than anything,' Rodman added".

From: h ttps://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/stephen-colbert-dennis-rodman-kim-jong-un_us_5a324754e4b01bdd765a19a1

"'He’s more like a kid than anything," Then spank him and send him to bed without supper. Or nuke him. Whatever

"Drunken plow truck driver causes head-on crash in Jefferson County, authorities say"

"A drunken, wrong-way plow truck driver caused a head-on crash Wednesday that injured a woman in Jefferson County, the Sheriff's Office said.

"The 18-year-old Jefferson man was driving a flatbed plow truck eastbound in the westbound lane of U.S. Highway 18 in the Town of Jefferson shortly before 5 a.m., according to a news release.

"Just east of state Highway 89 the plow truck collided with a westbound pickup truck driven by a 53-year-old Jefferson woman, according to the news release.

"Both drivers were taken to a hospital with injuries that are not life-threatening and the plow truck driver was arrested for injury by intoxicated use of a motor vehicle, the Sheriff's Office said.

"The crash closed Highway 18 between Highway 89 and the state Highway 26 bypass for about four hours, the Sheriff's Office said."

https://www.jsonline.com/story/news/2017/12/13/drunken-plow-truck-driver-causes-head-crash-jefferson-county-authorities-say/950374001/

How come when stuff like this happens, an 18-year old is a "man," but if there's criminals involved, an 18-year old is a "teenager?"

"Modifying the Stealth Hippie Van – The Next Episode"

https://timstoyymore.wordpress.com/2017/12/14/modifying-the-stealth-hippie-van-the-next-episode/

Alltime10s Thursdays

Open Blog - Thursday

Looks like someone likes to go barefoot, like THB.

Wednesday, December 13, 2017

Dear Madame Zoltar

How are your holidays going so far? Ready for the nuthouse yet? There must be some human need to torture ourselves this way. Merry Christmas, damnit! I've done the majority of my shopping online and the "boys" have decorated our home beautifully, so I've had it pretty easy. I'll pay for it by cooking a monstrous Christmas dinner. Let's see who does the dishes . . .

Have you heard about the Milwaukee asshole alderman who wants to annex the land that Foxconn has selected in Racine County? http://journaltimes.com/news/local/milwaukee-could-annex-racine-county-land-attorney-says/article_496908d6-53d7-54cb-939a-03026ca4cf8d.html#tracking-source=home-featured Um, Foxconn has already made their choice. If they wanted to build in Milwaukee, they would build in Milwaukee. Don't worry your little aldermanic head. Maybe you should lay claim to some space on the moon. It has great growth potential.

These multi-million dollar developments always bring out the worst in us. The money grab can get quite vicious. Everyone is falling all over themselves in an attempt to spend millions of our tax dollars on just a promise. Everyone is jockeying for position. I believe that the management of Foxconn is laughing their asses off at us. Who won World War II?

Injured Green Bay quarterback Aaron Rodgers watches warm ups before the Packers’ Nov. 26 game against the Pittsburgh Steelers in Pittsburgh. Rodgers, who broke his collarbone six weeks ago, has a chance to return to the field Sunday against Carolina.
DON WRIGHT, Associated Press

Of course, the big news in Wisconsin, even bigger than Foxconn, is that Aaron Rodgers has been cleared to play in Sunday's football game, mostly. Some doctors seem to think he should take more time. Are you kidding? With Rodgers back in the game, we might even have a chance at a playoff spot. What's more important: your health or money? Obviously, money. Kill them this Sunday, guys!

Here are the Irregular Football League standings:

How Mr. OrbsCorbs got past me, I'll never know.

Remember, my friends, as we get closer and closer to Christmas and New Year, take some time out for yourself. The holidays will happen no matter what you do or don't do..

madamezoltar@jtirregulars.com

Be careful out there amidst the hustle and bustle of holiday madness. You never know when or where the Mad Santa will strike next. I love you all.
__________________________
Please donate: paypal.me/jgmazelis
If you don't like PayPal, send me a note at madamezoltar@jtirregulars.com and I'll send you my street address so you can send a check or money order. Thank you

"Taking The Toy From Stock to Wild"

https://timstoyymore.wordpress.com/2017/12/13/taking-the-toy-from-stock-to-wild/

Open Blog - Wednesday

That is, I believe, a pansy.

Tuesday, December 12, 2017

"Customarily On High"

From the Shepherd Express:

by Art Kumbalek

December 12, 2017

4:32 PM

I’m Art Kumbalek and man oh man manischewitz what a world, ain’a? Cripes, what a focking world, indeed. For starters, I just got off the phone with my buddy Little Jimmy Iodine who graciously informed me that not only was I not chosen as TIME magazine’s person/place/thing of the year, but that yet again “Art Kumbalek” failed even to make the cut for their “short list,” what the fock.

So yeah, you might imagine it’ll be a blue Christmas around the Kumbalek household, since my annual wish to be some kind of Person of the Year will once again not be granted (not to mention my wish that these goddamn scientists find a way to clone Marilyn Monroe and then send one to my doorstep pronto speedy delivery).

And there’s this, again: I understand that for many of you’s the holidays come by but once a year, but as I’ve said many times, many ways, everyday’s just another focking holiday to a guy like me, you betcha. Yes sir, you name the day, and it’s sure-as-hell bound to be some kind of a focking holiday for Mr. Art Kumbalek.

And just so you know, I’m not the type who feels the need to ignore the saintly saviour on my holiday-times-365, no sir. Not a one every-focking-day holiday passes that I do not entreat the Lord one way or another here and there, from “Jesus H. Christ, where the hell is the focking bus?” to when I’m shopping and must proclaim, “Jesus focking Christ, you got to be jerking my beefaroni. You want how much for that piece of crap?”

And yes, I have no ethical situation with regifting at this time of year, so there could be this: Just one more thing for this essay ’cause I know you’re all too busy to read this schmutz anyways, what with the hustle and bustle of the but-once-a-year holiday blah-blah: It’s about the music. The Christmas songs—especially the religious tunes for those who may wonder, and perhaps question, what God’s personal part/stake is in the topsy-turvy what-the-fock events of, lo, these days. I’d like to add a selection to the songlist.

It’s called “Elmer’s Tune,” from a turbulent year we call 1941. For me, I find it to be the most meaningful religious ditty I’ve ever heard, and that’s because I’d like to think God’s name—the one his pals call him—is Elmer. Got a nice, comfortable ring to it, ain’a? I like to call him Elmer because there were gods before “God” and, who knows, in another couple, three millennium, it might be back to a bunch of gods again; so I get confused by who’s-who, what the fock. Besides, as a name, “God” sucks. Always seemed cold, impersonal to me. But Elmer? All I know is that when I sing his tune, I feel a whole lot better and you will, too. Here’s the words. I’m sure you’ve heard the melody before but if you haven’t, look it up somewhere (like on the internet of the YouTube—The Andrews Sisters got a nice snappy rendition, I kid you not). OK, here we go, what’s say a nice, bouncy key of G, the people’s key:

Why are the stars always winkin’ and blinkin’ above?

What makes a fellow start thinkin’ of fallin’ in love?

It’s not the season, the reason is plain as the moon;

It’s just Elmer’s Tune.



What makes a lady of eighty go out on the loose?

Why does a gander meander in search of a goose?

What puts the kick in a chicken, the magic in June?

It’s just Elmer’s Tune.



Listen, listen,

there’s a lot you’re li’ble to be miss-in’;

Sing it, swing it,

any old way and any old time.



The hurdy gurdies, the birdies, the cop on the beat;

The candy maker, the banker, the man on the street;

The city charmer, the farmer, the man in the moon—

All sing Elmer’s Tune.

Yes sir, praise be to Elmer. All sing Elmer’s tune whether you like it or not. And don’t forget to enjoy some holiday fruitcake this year, the one so-called food for which the scientist has yet to determine an expiration date, ’cause I’m Art Kumbalek and I told you so.

From: https://shepherdexpress.com/around-milwaukee/art-kumbalek/customarily-on-high/

Holy Shit!

My Social Security benefit is going up $26 @ month next month. I think that's the largest increase I've ever seen. Usually, it's a few bucks, or none at all This increase doesn't cover all of the increases in my monthly expenses, but it's much better than before. Thank you, O God of Social Security. Bless You in Your generosity.