Dear Madame Zoltar

Hello, my chirping chickadees! How are you? I know that the weather has been dreadful lately. There were frost warnings a couple of nights ago! Oh my. Fear not, my dear Irregulars. Despite Mr. OrbsCorbs’ misgivings about my weather predicting skills, I’m going to go out on a limb and say that the weather will get warmer as Ms. Why Not? and her family approach Racine. A hometown girl will bring us warmth all the way from Sweden. Stick that in your pipe and smoke it, Mother Nature.

Of course, we all know that Ms. Why Not? has been preparing for her and her family’s summer trip to Racine for weeks. Finally, as you read this blog, they are aboard a train, starting their trip here. It was very hectic a few days ago, however. Ms. Why Not? was feeling the pressure and emailed me on Sunday:

“Hello to the glorious Madame Zoltar,

“I'm sure you have seen in my posts that I am in the middle of getting ready for my flight back to my beloved Racine for a longer trip ‘home’. With this I have my travel cleaning which is quite extensive, I have to complete some school work still, I have sick kids that just are not getting better yet, I have the packing still needing to be done somewhat and all of the saying goodbye and visits still to complete and I'm sure a hundred other things before we head off on a train Wednesday morning.. Last week Maia was quite sick with fever and eye infection and other less plesant things I'd rather not bring up here to spare everyone who reads your blog and now it is Mina's turn, she now is showing signs of an eye infection and ear infection on top of a terrible cough and just plain grumpiness .. I feel as though I am losing my mind, with all of the stress.. Do you have any words of wisdom, magic potions or magic spells that you could use on this poor run down stay at home mom and student to get me through these next couple of days? Can you see into my future and tell me things will be just fine on the flight and things will get done in time? I could really use any form of help you could spare..

“Thank you,
Why Not?”

Oh dear! Ms. Why Not? needed my help and I couldn’t wait until she read my blog today to assist her (if she’ll even have the chance). I replied to her immediately:

“Dear Ms. Why Not?,

“Oh my, oh my, my dear, dear child. Please stop, take a deep breath, and know that Madame Zoltar is always with you and all the other Irregulars. Everything will be just fine. Honestly. I am a professional and this is what I do.

"'I feel as though I am losing my mind, with all of the stress.. Do you have any words of wisdom, magic potions or magic spells that you could use on this poor run down stay at home mom and student to get me through these next couple of days? Can you see into my future and tell me things will be just fine on the flight and things will get done in time? I could really use any form of help you could spare.’

“Special psychic blessings were on the way the instant I received your message. You are taking on so much responsibility and I know how overwhelming that can be, especially as you approach the deadline for your trip. Instead of confronting all of the tasks at once, take them on one at a time. Chop everything up into little pieces, and do it one piece at a time. That's the only way I can get through the day sometimes. Otherwise I would worry myself to death.

“You have a couple of special miracles in your daughters. Children will get sick from time to time. It's part of the ritual of growing up. Follow medical advice, comfort them as best you can, and know that this, too, shall pass.

“I have peered deeply into my crystal ball and I see no major obstacles to your trip here. I see that you will enjoy most of the trip and especially enjoy your visit in Racine this summer. In fact, I predict that the warmth won't really arrive in Racine until you and your family do.

“Have faith. Know that you are loved and cared for. Take the time to slow your breathing and center yourself. We all worry so much about so many things, and the vast majority never happen.

“I would send you some Zoltar® Brand Medical Relaxant and Nerve Tonic by overnight express, but my potions never pass customs. Bah! As I said, though, you and your family will be fine. We all look forward to seeing you at the next JTI gathering. Relax and enjoy the adventure. Remember to take time for yourself. I will send an extra psychic boost whenever I sense that you need one, dear. Take care of mom - that's you!

“Love,
Madame Zoltar”

So there you have it, Irregulars. Ms. Why Not? and family (“The Why Not?s”?) are on their way to grace Racine for an entire summer. I look forward to meeting them and all of you again at the next JTI gathering.

Please note that emails submitted to me are answered in my blog the following Wednesday. In dire circumstances, or at the request of any Irregular, I will reply personally. If you need my assistance, my friends, I am here for you. Please also note that emails submitted to me are published in my weekly blog, unless you request otherwise. Of course I will protect your privacy if you desire. The relationship between a psychic and her client/Irregular is a special one, like that between a doctor or lawyer and a client.

Please send your questions and comments to: madamezoltar@jtirregulars.com.

Thank you for reading my blog this week, my wonderful, dear Irregulars. I love each and every one of you. It’s time to put those coats in the closet until fall. Get out and enjoy yourselves. Saprophytism!